My male classmate and fellow monk appeared to have the "hots" on me. I was very confused and in a state of semi-panic. "She" would be near and constantly and try in any manner to get even closer to where I was sitting and or standing. He would shower me with attention and always would take the seat next to me. "She was openly "hitting on me", and it was like "dating" in the outside world. She chalked it to total lust and wanting me. I chalked it up to isolation, misery and just complete horniness. I enjoyed his femininity I was having very confused longings and a bit of lust towards her. Brother was a tad on the femmy side, but not a total he-she. My "fun-friend" was a bit obvious, and ostentatious, even though I did not have any feelings for Brother "TML", but loved the attention that she was giving to me. Too bad, maybe things would be different had I had my first sexual contact with a nun.Īlthough, I continued my nightly jack off sessions dreaming of Sally, Roberta Cathy, and Bonnie, I became aware that a fellow "Brother" who was my classmate was starting to flirt with openly with me.
The quaint village also housed a novitiate for nuns directly across the street as you can imagine, there was no contact between the novices. We were isolated, mistreated and just plain miserable. Noviate is a time to ponder vocations and the religious order I was joining. I had become a monk and was sent to a small town in Indiana for my novitiate. I distinctly remember in junior high when my female classmates started sprouting tits, that I knew right then that I wanted to see, bite, chew, touch, grope, and suck all the titties I could possibly could. I am still a confirmed tit man in my older years. I am unashamedly a total self-professed "tit man" who unashamedly has/had an oral fixation on boobs and most especially on women with pink nipples. Getting caught in boarding school would have been an embarrassment, but getting caught at the monastery would have meant immediate expulsion and condemnation. Jacking off in boarding school was risky, but not as risky or when I became a 'brother' in the monastery. I was hooked on fantasy and self-pleasure. I had great fantasies about women, and jacked off to erotic fantasies of women. Never did anything about those feelings and practiced my vow of celibacy to the letter.
I did have mini-longings for a of classmate in boarding school, but I thought that the raging testosterone was taking over. I distinctly remember "wanting" Sally and Roberta in grade school and Cathy and Bonnie in high school boarding school. I was a 20-year-old virgin and had fantasized about lots of women. I always imagined having my "first time" with a sexy gal, but nonetheless my first sex was great! I often fantasize and wish for more. WOW, "it" finally happened!!! I had had my first sex, and it was with a fellow brother monk in the monastery. Brother / Sister/Slave, ("TML") November 1970